Ok, this is me. See me staring at myself in the camera phone and giving you the chance to view me in magnificent glory. Hehehe.
I know what you're thinking... Another blog? I will start this one off by letting you know about things that are important to me. I used to write an online journal, but I wavered in recent years and I guess a part of me wishes I'd continued to post that stuff. So... In the meantime... I'll write this blog to talk about what's important to me and give you insight into how I view the world.
Epiphanies can happen instantly, or they can sneak up on you gradually. In my case, I finally woke up and realized some very small, simple truths that dictate how I live my life right now. And I'll share them with you.
1) Focusing Your Energy - I realized I spent too much time, money and resources on people I didn't care about. Whether it was obsessing about why someone I didn't even like hated me or why I'd lost a job, to loaning casual acquaintances money I didn't have, to hanging out with people I didn't enjoy being around and didn't like.
I would give to people who didn't value my contributions and who gave me nothing in return. I would seek the approval of people who's opinions I actually didn't care for. What a terrible waste. I still fall victim to it today on occasion. But for the most part, I've been able to control it.
Now, I invest in those I care about. Whether it's time, money or whatever... I've learned to prioritize my resources and direct them toward those people who deserve them. Namely, my family and close friends.
2) Choosing Your Role - I've come to realize, just because people are related, doesn't mean they get along or like each other. Throughout my life I've been closer to some family members and distant from others. Although there are many reasons for these relationships to be weak or strong, some of them are reasons I can control.
I could go on and on about this topic, but let me boil it down as simply as I can. I consider a person... Let's say my Mom for example... I have my opinion of her and I'm sure she has one of me. So I think about my relationship with her and, (here's where it gets a little morbid), I think about how I'd want her to remember me if I died tomorrow. In her case, I want her to remember me as someone she could talk to. Someone she could confide in, but who wouldn't judge her choices and someone who encouraged her. I'd want her to think of me as the person who helped her become more assertive in expressing her feelings. Most of all, I want her to remember me as a friend.
With this image in mind, I approach each contact with her as an opportunity to build that image in her mind. It influences my decisions in regard to her. For example, if she asked me to help her haul some furniture... I weigh the decision like this... "Will helping her right now help me be the man I want her to know?" If the answer is yes, I do it.
Do I think this behavior is disingenuous...? No, because I'm not acting. I'm just putting forward the side of myself I want her to see and interact with. I'm making a decision to leave the bad stuff behind and be that person. Ultimately, I think that's what we do everyday in our lives. In the small moments. Like holding a door open for someone. Or letting someone in when you're driving in traffic. To that person, for that moment... You are a very specific type of person. And that's how they will think of you. I want my impressions to last longer.
3) Discovering Your Mystery - As a former Mormon, I've heard people talk about the Purpose of Life many times. The LDS church has its answer to this question. For some, it's one they accept; for others, it's not.
I believe we're here for a reason. I think we're here to solve the mysteries of our individual selves. In every aspect of life, we assume different roles. Many of these roles affect the way we behave. But deep down, at the core of those masks... There is the real you. And you need to find that person. It all starts with being honest with yourself and looking at yourself objectively, through critical eyes. The more you begin to understand yourself, the more control you have over those things. Eventually, you gain the power to be the person you want to be. You gain your authentic self.
This would make more sense if I had hours to map out my ideas. Most of them I took from a philosophy class I had at SCSN. Let me just say, the more I understand myself, I more in tune I am with those around me. I'm more respectful of others because I see how I impact them. I can destroy people, or nurture them just through my actions.
So...
My mission with this blog is clear to me. When I write in it, I'm going to write about those things that matter most to me. Those people, places, events, etc. etc. I'll share my impressions, feelings and maybe someone will read it, maybe they won't. But here goes...
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